I am at that stage of my life that I do not necessarily need others around me. I am perfectly content just in the quiet of my home, or running errands on my own, even shopping alone can be so nice.

Sometimes, I go places alone just to have that time by myself. I have found peace in being alone and so enjoy that time to be in my own head. It gives me time for reflection and to count my blessings. I enjoy my time with God. I could have never gone through my healing without Him.

Being alone also provides the ability to go where I need to go and get what I need to get without waiting on someone else. I am also not being persuaded or influenced, even if that may be by my own ideas to purchase something that I do not need or will not use or wear, because 9 out of 10 times that is what my history has shown when I have gone on shopping trips or errands with another person or two.

My favorite place to spend my time is in my yard, it is not an oasis by any means, but it has green grass and a few flower beds that I tend to and some plants in pots. I love the sounds of the birds and even some insects. The peace that I feel just being outside is better than anything, especially when I have the warmth of the sun on my skin. Nothing can beat watching a nice rain when we need it from our patio. I truly feel being close to nature is the best therapy for anyone and the best place to spend in quiet.

Alone time has also helped me to slow down my mind. It allows time to heal, especially in this world that seems to have such irrational ideas anymore. I find myself needing time without the radio or television, as they can both be so “loud” and cause unsettling in our hearts and minds. I know we need to stay informed, but now that my son is not in the military, I do not pay as much attention or put too much stock into what the media is saying, as how do we know what to believe.

In the last year I have enjoyed so many books, many of them audible only because I love to listen to a good book while driving, cooking, baking and all my other so-called chores around the house. Awesomely enough, I found a Marine mom friend on Facebook that seems to like the same types of books as I do and every time, she posts a book, I buy it or check it out through the Libby App. Thrillers with plot twists are the best, I am not sure what that might say about me. All joking aside, I am glad to have this opportunity and alone time to enjoy reading or listening to a good book.

I think too many times we find ourselves lonely instead of taking in the “quiet times” and using that time as a sabbatical of sorts from the world. I have worked most of my teenage years and into adulthood. I worked my way through college and into motherhood. From working full time as well as raising toddlers to school age, and then on. We are consistently around people. We can be consumed by human interactions. We may be around people that we may enjoy and some that may only choose to be around us for their own personal agenda and once that agenda has been met they move on. Some interactions can be so hurtful.

 Initially, when I had left my job of 13 years, my husband thought I needed to get out there and find another job, he thought I would be so bored and that I needed to be around people, he did not know how the years of working and “playing the game” in society could be so hard and so very tiring.  I was burned out. He thought I was the type that needed to be around people. He only knew the “old me”, the social me. He did not know the, “I’m burned out”, “I don’t want to people anymore”, me. It wasn’t until that day I came home having a full-blown anxiety attack from working in a setting that was so damaging that he truly saw me and for who I was. The me that does not want to be “people-ly”, because being around people changed me.

I am forever so grateful for my husband and his understanding, which has allowed for me to have my “alone time”. Although I still love people, I have boundaries and sometimes I put up a wall, because I do not trust as easily nor love as hard as I used to. I think that happens the older we get. Live and learn, they say.

If you are ever wondering where I am, I am most likely just enjoying my “alone time” and probably sipping on a cup of coffee. Protecting my peace.